I spent some time developing a training for my sales team, based on some lessons I have learned through watching the television show “The Biggest Loser.”  You can apply these lesson to weight loss, as they do on the show, or to your financial business.  Enjoy!
Biggest Loser – Lessons

1- You MUST have a strong DESIRE – Desire is the foundation for life change.

2- Create a VISION – Begin with the end in mind.

3- GET STARTED! – It takes action to reach your goals.  You must take action.

4- Measure your progress – Know where you stand.

5- You should not go it ALONE – Doing everything by yourself can be lonely and discouraging.  Others will push you beyond what you can do alone.

6- Attitude matters, stay positive – Negative energy leads to struggle.  Surround yourself with positive people!

7- Establish a sense of urgency – Life is happening.  Whatever you choose to do in life, get at it.

8- Create short term wins – It helps to get the ball rolling in the right direction.

9- You won’t always see results – Trust that your efforts will eventually show.
 
10- You must (train)reprogram your brain – When you are way behind where you want to be, it’s easy to beat yourself up.  Small steps build confidence.  Develop an “I can do it” attitude.  An “Abundance” mentality.

11- You have to change your lifestyle – You must transform your habits, not just change your behavior in the short term.

12- You must work hard – It will not always be easy.  You will not be successful with a half-hearted effort or by looking for shortcuts.

13- You can have fun! – Boredom will kill your enthusiasm and activity.  Make it a game.

14- You have to be CONSISTENT! – The most successful people are consistent.  They make winning a habit, part of their daily lives.  The habits you learn along the way have to continue if you’re to be successful in the long term.
Neuroplasticity- The brain has the incredible power to change.  Simply put, there is nothing set in stone when it comes to our limitations or shortcomings.  We have the capacity to reinvent ourselves, to form new patterns of perception and action, thereby creating radically new circumstances in our lives.  Whatever is limiting you right now – no matter how deeply entrenched or painful it may be – is temporary and can be overcome.

“Your abilities are really not according to your learning or your education.  Your abilities are according to your imagination.  If you can see it (in your mind’s eye), you can bring it into being.”  Lester Sumrall, in his book “Imagination: Hidden Force of Human Potential.”

One point of that is that until you can correct and control your though life, you cannot control your real life actions.  We must get inside our minds to learn to discipline our thought life BEFORE we can discipline the hands and feet and our actions.

As Robert Stuberg said in “Creating Your Ultimate Destiny,”  “Actions are the physical result and manifestation of mental decisions.  Your thoughts control your actions, and therefore your life.  A mind of great thoughts has no room for small thoughts.”  So, when you are planning on creating your family, be sure to imagine and think about how you would like it to look.  Don’t just drift along and end up somewhere that you never intended, be PURPOSEFUL and create your life in your mind, then go to work to make it happen.

Napolean Hill, in his book “Think and Grow Rich” wrote:  “Everything is a state of mind.  This includes health, wealth, and happiness.  For example, if your thoughts are on health — the best health possible for you will come to you.  Your mind can become your greatest asset — or your worst nightmare, depending on how you care for it.” 

Are you purposeful when it comes to your family?  Your role as a parent?  Your career?  Or, do you just let the chips fall where they may and deal with it later? 

Part of being an involved and loving Dad is to take a leadership role in your family, and create in your mind the desired result before you create it in reality.  Take some time to think about where you are, where you want to be and how you are going to make that happen.

Thanks for caring about your family and being an involved Dad.  We need more of you!  Have a great day.

The movie is very accurate in a lot of ways, like how it portrays the home life of Kate and Jack and their 2 kids.  The house is always cluttered and messed up.  There are kids toys, drawings, books and clothes everywhere, which is quite a shock to Jack who is used to being a wealthy bachelor.  It’s kind of like that for many new parents, the shock of life-change and the realization that some things that you used to hold on to, (organization, free-time, etc.) you now just have to let go.  My wife and I were very organized and kept a clean house before we had kids.  We fought it hard for a while, and still do occasionally, but ultimately we have learned to not sweat the small stuff.  Clutter is part of the deal.

The scene where Jack is changing the baby’s diaper is also very funny.  I remember a friend of mine changing his young son while wearing a kayak nose-plug!  For whatever reason, I don’t get bothered by changing diapers at all.  Good thing too.  I change about 90% of the diapers in our house.  That was one of our agreements, my wife takes care of the breast feeding and I take care of the diapers.    Of course, I do help with the breast feeding by bringing her water, the boppy, a burp rag and the baby.

The scene where Jack goes through his typical week is also similar to reality.  “I get woke up in the morning with dog saliva on my face, get dressed, walk the dog, drop the kids off, spend 8 hours selling tires retail, retail Kate, then I get home, walk the dog which has the added benefit of me karting off her immense crap, play with the kids then go to bed and get 6 hours of sleep if I’m lucky… only to repeat the same thing the next day.  What’s in it for me?  Where are my Mary Janes?”  To which Kate replies, “Who are you?”  They then have a conversation on the drive home about what they have given up, and what they have.

Having traveled extensively across our country, I can tell you from experience that nearly everyone thinks they are giving something up and that other people have it better than them.  Of course that’s not true, but it’s human nature to think the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.  I always thought that if it was greener on the other side of the fence, maybe it’s because that person is watering it. 

Anyway, the movie is well done, touching and I enjoy watching it.  It also makes you think about what is really important to you.  And if you had it all to do over again, what would you change?  And if you would change things, start right now so that you won’t look back in another 13 years and think the same thing.

I encourage you to go watch the movie, and do some thinking about your values and what you hold dear.  Cherish your family.  They are the best thing that will ever happen to you.

1- They wanted to feel like somebody special in the eyes of their parents.  How do you make a child feel special?  Tell them, and show them by listening to them and spending time with them.

2- They wanted their parents to treat them in a warm and friendly manner, just like they treat people outside the family.  Children are very sensitive to being treated as if they are less important than the parents friends, co-workers, and even complete strangers.  Treat your family well.  Don’t be nice to everyone else and rude to your kids.

3- Children want to know they are important to their parents.  Are you involved with your children?  Stop, put down what you are doing and focus on them.  “Do less FOR me and more WITH me” was the most popular phrase among teens.

4- Children want their parents to KNOW them.  Kids, especially teenagers, are constantly changing and re-inventing themselves.  Keep knowing them.  “Please understand me,” “spend time with me,” were common statements by teens. “Take the time to know me.”

5- Children want to express their views and know that they are valued.  Empower your kids.  Ask them, “What do you think?”  “How would you solve this?” “What would you do?”  This makes kids feel important.  I benefited from this tremendously as a kid myself.

6- Children want to go to school with kids they relate to.  They see the parents as very powerful in deciding where they live and where they will go to school.

7- Children want to be a part of a HAPPY family.  How much do you laugh together?  What is the overall tone at your home?  Is it happy and fun?

8- Teens want their parents to “lighten up.”  Many adults are too serious about themselves which makes them more negative and less fun.

9- Children want to learn more about their own emotions, so they need a safe environment to be able to express themselves.  They shouldn’t have to worry about being attacked (verbally or physically) for expressing their views.

Remember, we instill the same values in our children that we have and exibit ourselves.  You can’t give what you don’t have.  You can’t have happy, fun, intelligent kids if you are negative, depressed, worried and irritable.

Simple ways to make your children feel special:  Smiling, hugging, holding, praising, spending time with and listening to them.  Really listening to them helps build their self-esteem.  Key.

Help your children lead purposeful lives.  Show them that there is a purpose to commited relationships.  There is a purpose to school.  There is a purpose to life.  Lay a foundation of values because your children will make choices based on these values.  You won’t always be there to guide them, but the value system that you teach them will be.

He was asked the other day on the radio about why he didn’t go into coaching, as he has a very good grasp of defensive football and a love for the sport as well.  His reply was that coaching at the college or professional level was too time consuming for him, he valued his role as a Dad too much.  Anthony has 3 young children, and he wants to spend as much time with them, teaching and guiding them, as he can.  Well said.  I am very proud that Anthony has that viewpoint, it’s the same reason I don’t travel doing sales and personal development trainings anymore.  Being there for your family is tremendously important.  Here is an ex-professional athlete, who still has a lot of knowledge of and passion for the game, who chooses to lead his family. 

Anthony does coach youth sports, and runs many sports camps in the greater Portland, Oregon area.  I like his philosophy, and his great kids and wonderful, loving family are the result of his commitment to them.  Thanks Anthony, for being an inspirational athlete AND an inspirational Dad.  We need more Dads to live by what they believe.

Check out Anthony’s Dad of the Month interview in the archives located on the main www.dadsworld.com homepage.  Also, be sure to check out his site at www.xsportcamps.com

Any male can father a child, but that doesn’t make you a Dad or a Father.  A dog can father offspring, so what makes a Dad any different?  Sticking around and being involved.  Even when you would rather do other things.  A Dad is there for his wife and kids, through thick and thin.  Day after day, and year after year.  A Dad, a REAL Dad, sticks it out and loves his family.  That is what makes us different than dogs.  You often hear about men who get a woman pregnant, only to move on to a new and more “exciting” relationship.  But those are NOT Dads.  NO.  A Dad is there for his family.  He is a part of the family.

That’s really the point of life isn’t it?  To create offspring and teach them, worry about them, sacrifice for them and lead them.  Continue the life scenario.  If you are not a parent, you can’t understand the worry you feel about your children’s safety.  The concern you have for their success and well-being.  That’s not to say that you can’t have a fulfilling life without children.  Of course you can.  You can certainly accomplish great things without being a parent, but there IS another layer to life.  I know people who don’t have children who are extremely successful.  But there are depths of emotion and feelings of pride and fear, joy and anguish that they will never know.  Parenting (the right way, not just bringing a child into the world and leaving.)  Raising a family is the essence of life in the first place.

As a parent, your life focus changes from your single, non-parent years.  You now are affected by your family in every decision you make.  Like the farmer who sacrifices his life for his crop.  He works long hours, in the heat of the summer and the frozen months of winter.  He works from daybreak to nightfall.  He gives all that he has for the crop.  Sacrifice.  That’s the same thing that a Dad does for his family.  It doesn’t mean you give up on all of your hopes and dreams, but it does mean that you ensure your children can chase theirs.

I used to golf quite a bit when I was in my 20’s.  I enjoy the serenity, beauty and challenge of the game.  The problem with golf, aside from the fact that it costs too much to play, is that it takes several hours to play a round.  So, now that I have a 2 year old son and a 3 week old daughter, do you think I am going to go out with my friends and play golf for 4-5 hours?  No way.  I would much rather play hotwheels with my son or chase him around a playground or just sit and read him a book.  I haven’t golfed now in years, and I don’t miss it.

Priorities change when you become a parent.  They change in ways you can’t even predict.  I knew things would change when I had kids, I just didn’t really fully understand the depth of emotion and feelings I would have for them.  As it should be, they and my wife are my life.  My family is the most important thing to me, and that gives me strength and determination far beyond what I had during my single years.

Being a Dad is special, so embrace it.  Use it to motivate yourself.  It’s really the turning point at which you go from being a male, to becoming a man.  Be a Dad for Life.

When we got home, we were all sitting on the couch downstairs watching Blue’s Clue’s for Alex’s nighttime ritual and it was really amazing to see.  The 4 of us on the couch together, a family.  A few years ago that picture would have seemed like a dream, as we endured over 6 years of frustration in conceiving Alex.  My wife and I both have strong love for children and wanted to create a family in the worst way.  Yet it eluded us for so long.  Having our 2 children has been a blessing for us, and we are so thankful to have succeeded.

It’s already an amazing undertaking, juggling the new baby and a 2 year old.  I don’t see a whole lot of things getting done any time soon, as nearly every moment is taken up by either one of the kids or my wife who has many needs and little ability to walk up and down stairs, carry heavy things, etc.  My job at the moment is being the Dad and husband, ensuring that our family works and everyone feels connected, loved and is cared for.   Alex needs to learn just how fragile the baby is, and tone himself down when he’s around her.  He also needs a lot of attention from us, which is hard for my wife as she is responsible for feeding baby Haley every 2 hours around the clock.  I spend my time taking care of Alex, holding, changing and consoling Haley, cleaning up the house, being the errand man for my wife and trying to get a little sleep myself.  Work will have to take a back seat for a while. 

We knew it would be tough with 2 little ones, but of course we also knew the rewards.  I am so happy to have my family.  Now the focus is on getting it to work well, then I will have to shift back into career mode for a while in order to provide for them.  Juggling a career and family is the number one problem expressed by Dads in America.  It is so hard to be the loving Dad who spends all the time with his kids and wife that he (and they) wants, while also being the breadwinner and providing for them.  A nearly impossible task.  Something has to give.  Either you make a little less money, or you spend a little less time with your family… not an easy choice.

Right now, we are as happy as can be.  Sleep deprived and a little run down, but very happy.  Welcome home Haley.

With the frequency that major film stars seem to leave their lovers, it hardly seems like a good lifestyle to bring a child into.  Maybe Vin Diesel will live up to his claim of wanting to be a better person.  I sure hope he does. 

Of course that’s just my opinion.  I am sure there are plenty of people who think it’s wonderful to bring a child into a short-term, non-committed relationship.  What’s wrong with the nanny raising the child while the “parents” are out shooting movies and dating other talented, intelligent and likeminded stars?  Maybe we can find this kid a better mommy or daddy, after all, I didn’t know your real daddy that well anyway…

On the bright side, at least Vin Diesel does diapers and is involved in his daughters life.  That is truly what the little girl needs.  Good for him, and I hope he follows it through and stays with her mother so they can raise her together to become a healthy and well-adjusted adult.

Having a child is serious business, and I hope our celebrities will start doing a better job of setting the example for the young and impressionable people out there who idolize them.  Just because two stars are good looking and infatuated with each other does not mean they should have a child.  Creating a family is serious business, best left to those with the fortitude to see it through and the skill to make it work.  Maturity, self-control, patience, long-term thinking ability, selflessness and committment are key elements to a relationship that can successfully raise a child.  MANY celebrities are severely lacking in one or more of these categories, and thus not ideal parents. 

I hope Vin Diesel turns out to be one of the good ones, we need more of them. I enjoy him as an actor and am rooting for him as a Father.   

My wife and I celebrate our 13th wedding anniversary today.  I am so lucky to have such a wonderful woman as a wife and mother to my children.  We dated for 3.5 years before getting married in 1995, so we have been together nearly half of our lives.  Amazing.

We actually went to the same high school, although we didn’t know each other well.  We knew who each other was, but didn’t date or even hang out.  When we were Juniors in college, we were standing in the same 2 hour line to register for classes.  That’s what started it all.  Thankfully that was before online class registration.  In the “old” days, you actually had to stand in line and sign up for the classes you wanted, and hope that they weren’t filled by the time you got to the front of the line.  Many times these lines were an hour long or more.

Of course when I saw her, I recognized her.  We both were nearing the end of other relationships, so the timing was perfect.  After talking and getting to know each other again, I asked for her phone number, and a week later saw her by chance at a popular night club for college students.  There, she gave me her business card and I stopped by her work a few days later to ask her out on a date to the Oregon Coast.  She actually broke a toe the day before our date, so I spent most of the time carrying her around in the sand.  And the rest, as they say, is history.

We are going to welcome our daughter into the world any day now.  I am so excited and happy to be having a daughter.  It really will change the dynamic around our house… having a little girl running around.  It will be fantastic.

My parents have been very happily married for over 43 years, and my wife’s for 42 years, so we had good examples of love and commitment.  That’s extremely important for children to see.  Adults doing what they say they are going to do, and all the while loving and honoring each other.  You don’t see much of that in the movies and on television shows these days, unfortunately.  That is having a very negative impact on our society, all in the name of cheap laughs and money.  Oh well, that’s another topic.

I want to extend my personal thanks to all of you involved, loving parents out there that have created strong families.  You are the hero’s of today.  Stand by your family and help make the world a better place.  Thanks for your support of Dadsworld.com!

Baby Boomers are the most affluent Americans in U.S. history with more than two-thirds of the nations financial assets and an estimated $1 trillion in disposable annual income.  Over 80 percent of Boomers own homes. 

Boomers are the wealthiest generation in U.S. history, but only 1 in 10 are truly affluent.  These elite Boomers have an annual household income of $150,000.  They are also overwhelmingly married (92%) and college educated (92%).  They also live in homes valued at nearly double that of the average Boomer.

Boomers represent 26% of the population nationwide, according to the U.S. Census Bureau.  One in four Boomers owns a second property, other than their primary residence. 

Another interesting fact is that Adults over the age of 50 are the Web’s largest constituency, 72% of American Baby Boomers have broadband access in their homes.  Using the World Wide Web to reach these people is an excellent marketing tool, and seems to be on the verge of virtually replacing print media.  Why would someone read a newspaper when the story has been online for over a day by the time the paper is printed?  The paper is old news in this age of instant reports online. 

In my Real Estate business, we see value in local community papers for near-by events, but the bigger papers don’t provide much value for our customers.  Most buyers in the Real Estate market today use the internet for their searches and research.

My hope is that with the growing use of the internet, Dadsworld.com will grow and become a place for people to go for resources, entertainment and information related to parenting.  We need to foster strong families and involved parents.  The good of the nation depends on it.  With so much junk and garbage online, it’s nice to have a website that represents commitment to family and involved parenting. 

Dadsworld.com… spread the word.