11 Qualities to Pass on to your Children

Here are 11 Qualities to pass on to your children, from Charles R. Swindoll.  I will add my own thoughts to each one of these qualities.  Good stuff.

One note, the BEST (perhaps the ONLY) way to teach these qualities to your children is to exhibit them yourself.

1- Determination.  “Stick with it, regardless.”  Resolve.  Teach your children that not everything comes easy.  Many things must be struggled for, but it’s critical to finish the job.  Be a finisher.

2- Honesty.  “Speak and live the truth — always.”  This is such an important quality in a person, and sadly lacking in modern culture.  Be a perosn of CHARACTER, and pass that along to your kids.  Invaluable.

3- Responsibility.  “Be dependable and trustworthy.”  Take responsibility for yourself and your actions.  Accept defeat without complaint and victory without apology.  You are responsible for your life.  In today’s culture (rampant entitlement mentality), this might be one of the most important qualities to model for your kids.

4- Thoughtfulness.  “Think of others before yourself.”  It’s so easy to never grow up and be selfish.  It must be, just look around.  Watch how people act.  This is part of being a person of character, quality.  Those are good things.

5- Confidentiality.  “Don’t tell secrets.  Seal your lips.”  Respect others.  If you do, you won’t go telling everyone about others problems behind their back.  Gossip is in poor taste.  Don’t go there.

6- Punctuality.  “Be on time.”  This is a real hot-button for myself.  I am on time.  ALWAYS.  I EXPECT you to be as well.  If you can’t be on time, use your phone and let me know.  Just to show up 20+ minutes late like it’s no big deal is so incredibly selfish and rude, it makes me crazy.  Be a quality person who respects others time.

7- Self-control.  “When under stress, stay calm.”  Learing self-control is essential for happiness in life.  My 3 year old son has difficulty in this area, but then again, he’s 3.  By the time you are an adult, and especially by the time you are a parent, you had better have learned self-control.  It’s part of the maturation process, and a requirement for success.

8- Patience.  “Fight irritability.  Be willing to wait.”  Being able to delay self-gratification is very difficult these days, but an essential part of building a successful career.  It’s also a crucial component of parenting.  Patience needs to be developed.  You will be stressed and pushed well beyond anything you can imagine as a parent.  Being patient is a key to your (and your family’s) sanity.

9- Purity.  “Reject anything that lowers your standards.”  This goes back to a theme I have written about many times in this blog.  Doing less than your best errodes your self-confidence.  Maintain a standard for yourself.  In your personal performance and in the things you spend your time on.  For your confidence and self-image to suffer, it just takes YOU to know you are not meeting your standards.  Even if nobody else knows, you DO.  That’s all it takes to start the process to negativity, depression and poor performance.

10- Compassion.  “When another hurts, fell it withl him.”  As the saying goes, there’s a time to laugh and a time to cry.  Let life touch you.  Be empathetic to others.  This will help you better understand anothers point of view, and lead you to being more helpfull and kind.

11- Diligence.  “Work hard.  Tough it out.”  Be that kind of qulaity person known for getting things done.  There is great satisfaction in completing a tough job.  That builds self-confidence and leads to bigger and better things.  Don’t settle for putting in a half-way effort.  There’s no reward for that.

As I write these, I constantly am thinking about my own grandfather.  He was born in 1912 and always had great stories for my brother and myself growing up.  When I think of him, the word GENTLEMAN comes to mind.  He would be disgusted by so many of the common attitudes of today.  Meanness, entitlement philosophy, sarcasm, shock-culture, lack of hard work and the general lack of appreciation for what we have would not sit well with him.  He was a man of values and principles and he lived by them.  That’s something I will never forget, and hopefully I will pass along his life’s ideals to my kids.

We so desperately need these qualities today. It’s up to us, the parents to make sure these ideals don’t become extinct.  We can do it, and we MUST do it.  I want my kids to live quality lives, and it starts right here with me doing my part.